Breaking the Law-- So Bite Me!

Well, I had to drive 20 miles to get my hands on it and break copyright law to show the photograph of it, but BITE ME, I have two copies of Mel's made-of-the-awesome new novel... and I can prove it.



If you don't have your copy yet, why not? Barnes and Noble locations are carrying it, though some are too lazy to put it on the shelf quite yet. Borders claims not to have it in stock.

I highly recommend making a scene and demanding yours. Loudly!

Err Side Effects Are Generally Mild?

Side effects are generally mild. Some day I want to meet up with the sick, lying bastard who dreamt up that phrase. In a dark alley. With my Louisville slugger. Because seriously, what kind of propaganda spewing BS is that? They open every list of possible reactions to all medical treatments with this lie. It has become cliche. And this week it's pissing me off.

Yeah... look, I already told you people I planned on being a bitch this week. It's my blog. I'll bitch if I want to.

And I'm going to bitch, oh yes. Yeesssss I am. Take a gander at the "mild" side effects of IVIG. I dare you.

...adverse reactions to IVIg therapy are usually minor and occur in no more than 10% of patients. Mild-to-moderate headache, which responds to nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs, is common. Chills, chest discomfort may develop in the first hour of the infusion and usually respond to cessation of the infusion for 30 minutes and resumption of it at a slower rate. Fatigue, fever, or nausea may occur after infusion and may last as long as 24 hours. Other side effects include, dizziness, leg cramps, muscle aches and pains and pain and tenderness at the injection site. Side effects that should be reported to a health care provider include: difficulty breathing, shortness of breath, wheezing, chest pain or tightness, seizures or convulsions. A severe anaphylactic reaction may occur in patients who have a serious deficiency of IgA associated with anti-IgE or anti-IgG antibodies against IgA, which react with the IgA in the IGG preparation. The reaction is rare, occurring in about 1 out of 1000 people.

Ok. Well, thank gawd they're usually minor. Now... correct me if I'm wrong. Pulmonary fibrosis pretty much looks like this: difficulty breathing, shortness of breath, wheezing, chest pain or tightness-- all the time. Also, everyone at the lab who is getting the therapy has the side effects. Why are all 10% of the people with side effects hanging out together? Or did somebody flunk math class?

Um. Not to be a nitpicker, but you guys aren't just messing with me, right? Right?

Is there a cricket in here?

IVIG (without riboflavin)

So today I did my first treatment of IVIG therapy. IVIG, or Intravenous Immunoglobulin, is a nightmare. Ok, it only mostly sucks a lot, but it's not technically so much a nightmare as a major PITA. They take plasma from 1 to 10 thousand people to make one unit of IVIG, which is fortified with gamma globulin, but has not so much as a milligram of riboflavin. Or crunchy honey coating, either. No hearts, moons, stars, or clovers last time I checked into it. But it does contain five types of antibodies known to fight infection in the body, so don't get all snooty, k? What kind of antibodies do you sport, there, smart-arse?

Point is, my body stopped fighting infections due to the absolute crap I have put it through trying not to die from pulmonary fibrosis. Plus I'm now chronically anemic and the transfusions of USDA prime Ahmed blood don't seem to do the job any longer.

So for five days, and once a month thereafter, I will be getting an IV of IG and some crackers. It takes several hours for this stuff to trickle into me, so I'm on the George Bush Senior plan at the infusion lab. (Get it? Trickle down. haha!)

And why, you may ask, am I telling anybody? Well I plan to be an absolute bitch for a little while. I hate IV drugs. I hate anything that has to get into my veins directly because my veins are, after what they've been through, rubbish. It takes forever to get a line into me and forever to keep it, and the veins like to be shitty and shut down just for farts and giggles.

So if I love you but snapped at you for no apparent reason it's because my arms hurt and I hate the world. I still love you. I'll do something nice to make up for it soon, I promise.

Do you think the riboflavin might have made this much better? Yeah... I didn't think so either.

Ode to Kyle

For Mel Francis, with love:

ODE TO KYLE

Beside the door,
out in the hall,
his presence noted--
though quite small,
eliciting spontaneous smile
surprised was I to meet him-- KYLE.

Perched on his head
upon the floor,
the sentry stood
outside my door
and met me daily
during my stay
at this year's conference-- RWA.

Oh golden lad!
Oh suctioning boy!
Oh, gently leaning
shy and coy
upon the wall,
no trace of smile
in utilitarian silence-- Kyle.

He'll be remembered;
he'll be missed.
He's seen the world--
or, where it's pissed.
I leave him to
fly many miles
but never will I forget Kyle.

Golden Heart Winner Jeannie Lin

Congratulations to Jeannie Lin! She won the Golden Heart Historical Romance award for Butterfly Swords. I am so happy and proud of you!!

Help Stop PF with a GREAT Haircut

Hair dressers at TenXspa in Natick, MA are coming together to support PF on Swaturday, July 26, offering haircuts for $25. All proceeds will go to fund research on a cure for pulmonary fibrosis. Stylist Louis Massauro Jr. lost his partner, Sonny Otero, to pulmonary fibrosis in 2006. The cuts normally go for $69.

The event will be from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. TenXspa is right on Route 9, across from Shoppers World. Interested? Call manager Betsy Kanna at 508-875-2290. Walk-in appointments will also be taken that day. This is incredibly generous of the salon and stylist. PF is a disease that very rarely gets media or funding.

For more information, check out the Metro West Daily Article.

Arise, Sir Kool J

his week I have decided to crush on LL Kool J. Did you see him on The View this morning? If you don't find this guy smokin' hawt your meter's busted. For serious. He's got two kids heading for college and he can still bring the shit.

What I love most about Kool is the bad-boy who is a gentleman vibe. It's not often you see the real deal: a guy who nobody is going to mess with on the corner; but he also holds the door open for your granny at Walgreen's. I find that rare combination-- an alpha male who is also a bone-deep, moral man-- intoxicating to the point of absurdity. They make my knees go wonky and my heart race. These are the true cavaliers in the oldest, most glorious tradition of true manliness.

And it's smokin, smokin crazy assed smokin hawt.

And so, Sir Kool J, I dub the Lord of Ass Whuppin Sweet Tasty Awesome.

Arise and kick ass.

Hawt GOP Chicks

You know, I don't really have a problem with differences of opinion. I like differences of opinion and deeply respect people who can disagree with civility. My closest friends fall into this category for that reason. I loved sitting around last night at the beach with good, close, old friends who will have a debate with me.

But lately it seems like not only are people having a blast tearing apart Palin and Bush... they seem to be completely ignoring the feelings of their friends. I know it's getting to me. I'm actually completely fine with Democrats being in power. I'd rather my candidate won, but he didn't. But recently I have noticed a real one-way street on the jokes, snide remarks, and mean spiritedness.

Just remember that's me: the person who mailed you a check when you were crying about being broke; the person who gave you a gift when you said you couldn't make it without _fill in the blank_; the person who donated to whatever thing seemed important to you; the person who offered prayers; the person who supported you without asking how you voted or what you thought about my pet issues.

By the way... many, many studies have been done with regard to sex and politics. I think they keep re-doing them because every one has shown that republicans have better sex, and have it more often. And one of the reasons I am so fond of my progressive republican ideals is the flexibility they give me. I'm pro gay-marriage. I'm for civil liberties. I'm a human being, not a stereotype.

You know, when the Red Sox blow a game I can respond with "way to go, Seattle." I can cheer Derek Lowe at Fenway when his team is in town. Hey, he was family. Divorced or not, he got us to some big moments.

I sat with some old and dear friends last night and discussed the economy without anyone saying a single hateful word. Some of us were conservative; some of us were liberal. Nobody resonded with hostility. I think the reason for this is genuine intelligence and critical thinking ability.

But I must say... it made me re-think a few casual friendships. I think if people who have been eager and willing to run to me for help, handouts, and other boons are also willing to be crass, mean, and cheap when it comes to handing out generalized comments about conservatives... well, that was my error. Not theirs. Their character was there for me to see.

Missed a spot. But that's what cleaning products are for.