What I Learned in 2006

What I learned in 2006:

1. Things done in the spirit of good faith, whether they help others or not, are pointless if they make me miserable. My own happiness will be coming first in 2007. (Local charities take note, and update your nag lists.) This is going to be my selfish year.


2. Sink your teeth in long enough and refuse to compromise when you know you are right. I love threes. I had three "pit bull victories" in 2006 and look forward to more... and regular cleanings with the dentist. (It will be fun to see how many more than three people/agencies/organizations are self centered enough to think this is about them... it probably isn't. Carly Simon, anyone?)


3. Anything you love doing is worth doing. Photography has insisted on resurfacing in my life for a reason. There are no new successes I need, though there are some I covet. I've been successful in all the ways that mattered up til now and any new successes are luxuries. I like that. It's like karmic cashmere.


4. Nobody knows what SPAM really is, so report it, and pay for a decent filtering system. We won't be going down that road again (what is it about threes?) in 2007. Also, people will email me with private details of things I neither want, nor should, know about until I make them stop. For reasons I will never understand the same people will cower in a corner in terror of saying/writing these things to those who should hear/read them. Weird.


5. Comfortable is not the same as safe. Good people can be stupid on your behalf. I don't really watch my back but I do watch everyone else's fronts. This is the internet. There is a weasel in every nest, and I am usually among the first to know. (See number 4.) I sort of always knew that but again... comfort is a seductive siren. I go back to being suspicious on principle in 2007.


6. Funny is the hardest thing to write, but it's also what I do best. Back to funny I go, and see number 1.


7. My dog is more popular than I am. His blog was a hit, even with irregular postings. I'm jealous, and working it out in therapy. I'm also making him post more this year since he's such a big shot. (Ungrateful rat... grumble-grumble.)


8. Cancer is a wuss and I've got 5 notches on my lipstick case to prove it. Bite me, cancer!


9. Pulmonary Fibrosis didn't get Cancer's newsletter warning of the dangers of tangling with me. I will NOT be dying in 2007. Kiss my fat, white, Irish, slightly cellulite encumbered-- but bouncy just the same-- ass. I'm not going down to a hack. They can put me in an iron lung but I'm not dying this year. Too much to do.


10. I have Ahmed, and therefore have absolutely nothing to bitch about... ever. None of the challenges in my life even count. I get him. You can only have so much in the world, so my quota was eaten up by him. It was worth it and always will be. (I also assume everyone knows I will bitch anyway.)

There you have it... words of wisdom. If not wisdom, certainly optimistic wit and clever bravado. You'd be absolutely amazed how far you can get on clever bravado.