The Washer Woman's Wings

The Washer Woman's Wings
Christine Olinger

Old washer woman
with your cloak about you
lifting in the wind
like wings-- dark wings,
do you kneel there,
in the clay
of my long lost loves
to remind me?

Counting out
your scraps and cloths
like beans,
counted nigh on
to thirteen.

Is it thirteen?

Your numbers
never frightened me,
nor joining them
if it comes to that.

Your numbers
never called me,
though I've
heard the song
til it sings along
the strings of my soul.

They can clamour
outside my window,
howl and rage
in the misty night.

Let them come.
Let them rage.
But oh, your rags--
dark, flapping wings--
your cloak
does look warm
on this chilly winter night.

The NetZero Experiment: Final Result= Failure

Ok. About a month ago I saw an ad for Netzero Broadband DSL for 10 bucks a month. Being a cheapo, and recently relying on Verizon Broadband only for access, I thought I'd conduct a cheap-geek experiment. So I signed up, secure in the 30 day money back pitch.

Yeah. I know. But I did promise to report on it. So here goes...

If you are a total geek like me, you can get this service to work. I did, but only for a few minutes at a time. The modem they sent me was incredibly old and out-dated. I had to go find drivers for all my computers, because the drivers that auto-install are XP and earlier. The drivers I found for later versions of Windows had to be manually installed, and were very hard to find. I also found TONS of forum posts and consumer complaints about Netzero, their modems, and customer support being abusive. Q'elle surprise!

THEN I had to set the modem to ping itself automatically to work. It did... but the service was still painfully slow. This was kind of what I wanted to discover... was it worth 10 bucks a month or would it be so crappy it wasn't even worth 10 bucks a month? They never did provide any answer other than "it must be your computer." After two days of fixing their problems, and getting insanely difficult responses, (don't hate me, but I could barely understand them anyway), I figured I'd just cancel it and move on.

Ultimately, I invoked my 30 money back guarantee... only they ignored this, and charged me a second month, which I only today discovered. Then they said "you didn't cancel in 30 days, so will be charged a fee for cancellation."

Really? Ok, go with that, because I'm both bloody minded and smarter than you...

Cut to: my attorney general filing a small claims charge, and my bank telling me not to worry about it, they have my back. BTW-- on the flip side? Rockland Trust is the bomb. Just sayin'.

You loose, I win, and now I've warned others. LOL It's actually unfortunate... slow DSL for 10 bucks a month might have actually appealed to people on a very tight budget. I mean, it's as cheap as the coffee you'd have to buy to get free wifi in a cafe, right? But it has to work and the company has to be fair and honest... two failures here. Shame.

Blue Moon to Close 2009

This Monday is Yule. I hope everyone has a lovely start to the year-ending celebration of Winter. And I hope everyone has a wonderful, joyous Christmas next week, and Hannukah, and... everything you celbrate.


On another, kinda cool note, December 31 of this year we will get not only a Blue Moon (which is a second full moon in a single month), but a Lunar eclipse Blue Moon in Cancer, arriving at 2:22 pm... just minutes after the moon goes full.

Blue Moons are great times to open your house to friends, be impulsive, and welcome imagination. Since Cancer is a homey sign naturally, and loves the Moon, an eclipse at this time is just perfect. And what better time to share company and be spontaneous than New Year's Eve?

May the Blue Moon, Hunter's Moon, and Lunar Eclipse in watery, pearly Cancer bless the close of 2009 and greet 2010 with joy! I think this is a great sign at the close of this year.

My Pipe Dream

No, it's not a dream about hitting somebody with a pipe, though I have had those. I sometimes hear of friends having a book signing or getting ready for their big launch and literally ache with wishing I could be there. I'd love to show up with a bag of bottled water, energy snacks, extra pens, and promotional swag. Wear a blue tooth headset and treat it like a red carpet event.

"Hey... back behind the security cord, pal! There are only three copies of BITE ME left, and we're running out of STUPID CUPIDs."

(Hand to headset.) "I have to call you back, Brad, I'm putting out fires. No... no, Spielberg is going to have to talk to Gwen's agent. NO. I'll have to call you back, k?"

Anyway, that's my dream for 2010. I'm going on a few experimental treatments in the coming year and we'll see. I'm also on the transplant list, but we really hope that won't be happening. Right now getting on a plane is a risk, regardless of any precautions I might take. And travel by train and car is a risk, too, since it takes me away from my treatment team. But in 2010 I will be visiting a few places to see about changing things.

And if they fix me? BRACE YOURSELVES, DIVAS! You'll never be sure when I'll show up.

Jesus Loves You, But Thinks You're An Idiot

This week the Taunton school department stepped in it. It was an error. It was a BIG error. And while the teacher, principal, and other officials involved may have intended to do the right thing, they really, REALLY did the wrong one. So it's time to stop making excuses and step up with an apology. Because picking on a special needs kid is sick. If another student did it they'd suspend him or her.

The child in question was asked to draw something depicting how he spent his Thanksgiving vacation. He did, having visited a local (and very popular) shrine that has lovely lights, stations of the Cross, etc. Rather than question this kid, the teacher wigged. Her reaction was bigotry at worst and an incredibly stupid over-reaction at worst. Really, I think the bigotry is going to be hard to dodge. A few simple questions would have solved this tiny puzzle. In stead the school freaked out and traumatized a special needs student.

Claiming the drawing being circulated (seen here) is "not the original" falls a bit flat when questions as to how they differ get a refusal to respond... and the alleged original seems to have vanished. Psych evaluation of the child reveals he's fine. It is painfully obvious at this point that a huge mistake was made.

There is only one appropriate response. Suck it up and apologize. You blew it. Every new news conference makes Taunton school officials involved look more petty, more bigoted, more stubborn, and less qualified to teach anybody anything.

The Zombie Zone

Lately my life has been all about the zombies. Unlike vampires, zombies are still lingering in the fringes of publishing, though they have really started to take off. How long the trend will last remains to be seen, though Natalie Portman starring in Pride and Prejudice and the Zombies may be a contributing factor.

Like all things I get stuck on, I stumbled on the zombie thing accidentally. I've always kept a plot book-- crammed with ideas that may be brilliant or crap, depending on both perspective and mood. I was reacting negatively to a discussion of the zombie trend when the idea for my current WIP hit me. This happens to me a lot. I start to mentally prepare a criticism of something and realize I would like it, IF... and IF takes over.

One of the things I have done, as I enter the zombie zone, is research the serious side of zombies. No, really. I interviewed an actual Santeria priestess to get the facts from her perspective. I also talked to a funeral director at a family owned funeral parlor. I have about ten pages of notes.

Because once I know the rules, I can break them. Responsibly, I hope, but breaking them is the fun part. I like to anticipate every objection and answer it before it gets loose. So when zombie fans read my work and say to themselves "no, he wouldn't be decomposing yet," they are forced to put on the breaks the second one of my characters explains, patiently and clearly, the reason this preconceived notion is incorrect... at least in my newly created world.

So how do you create rules in a fictional world? And where do you stand on zombies? Frankly, I avoid standing on the ripe ones. They tend to go annoyinglyh smushy. :)

Harlequin Hysterics... Again?

Harlequin is at it again... and really, it's starting to look like some kind of bizarre publishing suicide. What gives? This is... what, the fifteenth screw up in three weeks?

This time they had a contest for "aspiring authors." Their own rules are very specific and clearly state:

This contest is open to entrants who are 18 years of age or older and is void wherever prohibited by law; all applicable laws and regulations apply. Employees and immediate family members of Harlequin Enterprises Ltd and Harlequin Mills & Boon Limited, including contracted authors, their parents, affiliates, subsidiaries and all other agencies, entities and persons connected with the use, marketing or conduct of this Contest are not eligible to enter. By acceptance of a prize, the winner consents to use of his/her name, photograph or other likeness for purposes of advertising, trade and promotion on behalf of Harlequin Enterprises Limited and Harlequin Mills & Boon, without further compensation, unless prohibited by law.

The problem? Two of the winners are published authors... with Harlequin. Check out how the loverly "congratulations to the winners" thread over on the forum goes absolutely batshit crazy about halfway down, when the authors are outed: http://www.iheartpresents.com/2009/12/harlequin-presents-writing-competition-2009-the-winners/#comments. And Suzanne Brandyn comments here.

It's entirely possible that both authors were sloppy and didn't read the rules carefully. It's also possible that the judges and officials were equally sloppy in checking entrants. But the whole thing is not just sloppy. It's yet another black eye to Harlequin, who seems to be begging for it these days.

Cover Envy

It's no secret that I often judge books by their covers, simply because beautiful covers make my heart stop. I dream of them. I lust after them. And yes... I buy them like a brain damaged waif follows the Pied Piper out of town. Money flies from my fingers when i see them. Two absolutely stunning YA titles suckered me in this week.

Hush, Hush by Becca Fitzpatrick is absolutely glorious, don't you think? The novel is a glorious, tense, romantic paranormal involving a battle between immortals and the fallen. I love the starkness of it... the agony and beauty of the shredded wings against the light. It makes me shiver.


Speaking of which... Fallen, by Lauren Kate, is another dark and lovely cover for yet another twisty, angsty paranormal romance. I haven't read either of these, but I think this one will get my first crack. The ravens drifting through the dark forest surrounding her-- they take my breath away. Her lace covered hands, her hunched posture... gorgeous. Beautiful, painful, anguished-- MAGNIFICENT!

I really love great covers. Feel free to share some of your favorites!!

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Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'

This month... on AS THE WEB TURNS... we had a lot of drama out here in the Interwebs Region of Romancelandia. Harlequin launched an epub; Harlequin became a Vanity pub; RWA wigged out and did something right; RWA wigged out and did something wrong; the mean girls got bitch-slapped, but it was for all the wrong reasons. In the end it has seemed to cause a quiet vacuum out here in Interwebby Romancelandia. Like... is everyone sulking, freaked out, scared, or just dumbstruck?

I'll be honest... the entire end of November had me depressed and disgusted. Oh, I'll admit to loving the drama initially. How could I not? I loves me a bandwagon; I luuuuuurves me a cat fight. But this was embarrassing. This was my profession looking stupid, petty, and tacky... again.



Still, the past week, perhaps in contrast or just as a result of the unnatural calm, has been too quiet. Spanked mean girls are sulking quietly. Harlequin gave a non-reversal reversal. The RWA is back to being a bunch of ridiculous warmed-up-cheerleader-leftovers... which is actually more par for the course. I feel a little like Alice after falling through the looking glass.

And I'll be honest... I'd love a good scandal right now. A nasty cat fight. As long as this kitty isn't in it.